16-Weeks Progress Report (FINALLY!)

16 weeks-old!

Margot turned 16 weeks-old yesterday, and we celebrated by playing at the dog park!!!  I’m shocked that I didn’t take more photos of her first dog park experience, but I was too busy loving every minute of watching her socialize with all the other dogs.  We met Courtney and Elsea there around 6:00 p.m. yesterday evening, and Margot immediately recognized Elsea.  There is a separate area for small dogs to run and play, which was empty at that time, so Courtney and I let Elsea and Margot have a little warm-up run around the empty area before I finally decided that Margot could probably handle meeting all of the other dogs.

Margot the wallflower

I don’t even know how to begin to describe what an awesome experience this was for me and Margot both.  Margot was a little overwhelmed at first when a herd of big dogs came over to greet her upon entering the park (we called this The Welcoming Committee, as this greeting procedure seemed to occur every time a new dog entered the park).  Margot mostly stuck to Elsea’s side at first and always made sure she knew where Elsea was whenever she got brave enough to explore on her own a little bit.  Meanwhile, Courtney and I were enjoying watching all of the dogs interact with each other and admiring all the different breeds.  One of my favorites was a GIANT, black Newfoundland, named Fat Head, who was so sweet and friendly, but still intimidated every dog he tried to play with because of his massive size.  There was also a sweet, stocky Bulldog, named Tank, a scruffy little Schnauzer/Border Collie mix, named Prudence, an adorable little mixed-breed puppy, named Miko, who was the same age as Margot, only half her size, a lot of Labs, lots of Chihuahuas, one Rottweiler, a Weimaraner, a couple of Boxers, a Husky puppy, and a bunch of awesome mutts! 

At one point, I was so caught up in admiring all the other dogs that I lost sight of Margot.  When I found her, she was sitting oh-so-properly in the corner of the fence, just watching all of the action around her.  I laughed at how intimidated and shy she was being and encouraged her to get back into the game.  She rejoined Elsea and ran around with her some more, but several minutes later, I found myself looking for Margot again.  This time, I found her sitting on one of the park benches, just chillin’ in between two dudes.  She definitely seemed more interested in making friends with the humans than with the other dogs for probably the first half-hour we were there.

"Get back in the same, Margot!"

During that time, Kristy and Zach came to check out the dog park and watch Margot play (Kristy was in HEAVEN, by the way), and Justin met us at the park after he got off work around 6:45 p.m.  Having more of “her people” there actually seemed to help boost Margot’s confidence a little, and she finally started socializing with the other dogs more, especially the little dogs.  In fact, by the end of the evening, Margot was having so much fun wrestling with a Chihuahua/Min Pin mix that Justin and I felt guilty making her leave!  But, alas, it was getting pretty chilly and I hadn’t brought a jacket, plus the sun was going down quickly, so we told all of Margot’s new friends “good-bye” and headed back home.

The one thing I learned right away about going to the dog park is that both the dog and the owner are going to come home covered in mud and dog slobber.  So, that meant that Margot had to have a bath when she got home.  The last time I had bathed her was probably a month ago, and she was a bit of a handful at that time because she kept trying to jump out of the tub.  Last night, however, I think she was too worn out to fight me because she just stood perfectly still the whole time I bathed her.  Afterwards, Justin wrapped her in a towel and she fell asleep in his arms while he held her on the couch. 

Making friends at the dog park

I honestly don’t think that Margot’s first experience at the dog park and with socializing with so many other dogs could have gone any better.  I’m so proud of her.  The weather is supposed to be nice again this evening, so I’m going to try taking Sam to the dog park with us tonight, as well!  I hope that Sam will enjoy it as much as Margot did, although I’m a little concerned that Sam might not handle meeting so many new dogs and people at one time as well as Margot did.  Sam’s 11 years-old, and for the majority of her life her world has basically consisted of me, Chris, Zach, Kristy, Ashley, Justin, Jocie, Lexie, and now Margot, and you guys remember how long it took her to warm up to Margot, right?  Typically, whenever another dog or unfamiliar person enters Sam’s little world, her initial reaction is along the lines of “Stranger!  Danger!”  She barks a lot at first, but she also calms down fairly quickly once she realizes that there is no actual danger.  So, I’m hoping that, even if she does freak out a little bit and bark at the other dog park-goers when we first get there, once she sees how calm I am and realizes how much fun Margot is having, maybe she’ll loosen up and actually enjoy the experience, too.  OMG, you guys just don’t even understand how happy it will make me if I get to watch my Samul run around and actually have fun playing with other dogs tonight!  I’m trying not to get my hopes up too high, but I do have a good feeling about this….

Anyway, I guess I should also give a quick 16-week progress report since I didn’t do one yesterday.   First of all, I’ve hung the bells from the kitchen door and have tried to encourage Margot to ring them before I take her outside to use the bathroom, but she is actually really afraid of those bells.  I thought maybe I just scared her when I first took her paw and made her touch them, so instead of making her ring the bells, I decided to just ring them myself before opening the door each time.  Well, I guess she just doesn’t like the sound, because that scares her, too.  Regardless, I haven’t removed the bells just yet.  You never know, she may get over it and eventually realize their purpose. 

Another thing that I’ve been doing lately, in regard to housebreaking, is leaving the sliding door open while we’re home so that Margot is able to go in and out by herself.  Margot and Sam both really seem to like this.  Last weekend, Margot actually took her Wubba toy outside to play with it on the deck while Sam laid outside on the deck with her and soaked up a little sun.  It’s just a shame that this is pretty much the only time of year that we’ll be able to leave the back door open for them like this.  It’s just not practical to leave the door open when it’s either really hot or really cold outside because it affects the temperature inside the house and lets in bugs during the summer months.  It makes me REALLY wish that we could have a doggy door because Margot hasn’t had one single accident while the back door has been left open for her.  In fact, whenever she goes outside to use the bathroom all by herself, she always comes RUNNING back inside and jumps all over us, smothering us with kisses, as if she’s really proud of herself!  Hahaha!  It’s pretty adorable. 

The only other major things to report are that Margot’s adult teeth are starting to come in, and she’s growing like a weed!  I kid you not, there are days when I SWEAR she has grown taller overnight.  Right now, she is almost up to my knees, which blows my mind.  What happened to that little 6 week-old peanut who used to be able to fit under my couch?!?!? 

Not only is Margot growing taller every day, but she’s also getting sweeter and sweeter.  This girl LOVES to be loved, and she gives as much love as she receives.  We still crack up at how Margot does her best to give everyone equal cuddling time whenever she’s hanging out with us in the evenings.  She’ll snuggle up to Justin and let him pet her for a few minutes, then she’ll get up and come over to plop down in my lap for a little while, and then she’ll get up and go over to the loveseat where Ashley is sitting to give her a few minutes of cuddle time, before eventually coming back over to Justin and starting the whole cuddle-cycle all over again.  It’s also funny watching her fight sleep for as long as she can.  Her eyes get really heavy, her blinks get longer and longer, and eventually her little head will start to wobble.  As soon as she nods off, though, she’ll quickly raise her head with her eyes wide open, and she’ll look around like, “What?  Who’s sleepy?  I’m not sleepy!”

I really cannot say this enough, but I honestly don’t know how I would get through the day sometimes without knowing that this little one is waiting for me when I get home.  After we got back from our vacation this past summer, I entered probably the worst depression I’ve ever experienced (and, if I’m being completely honest, I still haven’t really come out of it yet).  I’ve never been one to wallow in self-pity, but the amount of grief I’ve experienced due to so many losses in such a relatively short amount of time (first with losing Chris, then the devastating loss of Lexie after such a long, tortuous battle, and most recently the sudden loss of my Jocie just a month after losing Lou) has been, well, overwhelming, to say the least.  Unfortunately, each loss that I’ve experienced has also come with a huge price tag attached, which has resulted in a mountain of debt that I can’t even begin to wrap my brain around how I’m ever going to be able to pay off, which now has me seriously worried about losing my house.  There’s even more that I could add to this sob story, but my point isn’t to try to make people feel sorry for me (believe it or not).  My point is that Margot has been my little beacon through this fog since the day we brought her home two and a half months ago.  Sometimes, even I have a hard time believing how much joy she’s still able to make me feel, despite the fact that my life is pretty sad and crappy at the moment.  Margot doesn’t feel sorry for me, though.  She doesn’t know or care about what I’ve been through already or about how many more bad things are on my horizon.  All she cares about is playing and cuddling with me when I get home from work, which is actually quite a comforting thought.   I am so thankful that I have Margot in my life right now because she makes me forget about all of my sob-story problems and focus on something positive (her) every single day, even if it’s only for a few hours. 

To be clear, I’m not saying that Sam DOESN’T bring me joy because I do love Sam with ALL my heart.  However, after having just lost Lexie and Jocie so suddenly within a month of each other, I can’t help but face the reality that I’m eventually going to have to say good-bye to Sam, too, and it’s hard not to think about that every time I look at her now.  Once again, though, I have Margot to thank for not allowing me to focus on such negative thoughts.  Without Margot around, I’m certain that Sam would have spent the rest of her days just lying on the sofa, being lazy and lonely, and I would have done nothing but feel sorry for her and dread the day when I’ll have to let her go.  Instead, thanks to Margot’s persistence and Sam finally warming up to her, I get to watch my 11 year-old Samul play every single day, which brings me more joy than I can even begin to describe.   

Yes, I can say with 150% certainty that Margot is definitely the best unsure decision I have ever made.  I just hope that she understands how much she means to us and how much I appreciate her love, because I’ll truly never be able to say it enough…and Margot doesn’t understand English.  ;)

Bath time!

14-Week Progress Report



Margot is 14 weeks-old today!   Justin and I are so excited for her 16-week birthday that her birthdays feel like they can’t come fast enough right now, although I’m certain that feeling will change dramatically after she’s finally 16 weeks-old.  (Our vet recommended that we not allow Margot to go for walks, play in the park, or socialize with other dogs until after she’s 16 weeks-old because that’s when she’ll be fully vaccinated.)



14 weeks-old!



As far as a 14-week progress report goes, Margot has been a little out of her element this week due to the fact that we’ve been house-sitting for Justin’s parents, but I do have a few things to report.  For one, Margot has officially lost at least four teeth, but probably more.  Her biting has increased somewhat, but we understand it’s because she’s teething, and her biting is still pretty easy to correct with redirections.  She’s going through Nylabones so fast right now, though!  In fact, that just reminded me that I need to pick her up a new one tonight….

Another bit of progress that I’m able to officially report now is the fact that Margot and Sam have finally learned how to get along!  In fact, I think Sam has even become rather fond of little Margot.  She genuinely seems to enjoy playing with her, and we’ve even seen Sam initiate their playtimes on several occasions.   In fact, Sam and Margot spend so much time playing together in the evenings now that it sort of feels like Sam is our babysitter.  I used to come home from work, let Margot out of her crate and take her outside, and then basically spend the rest of the evening sitting in the living room floor playing with her.  Now, after I’ve come home from work and taken Margot outside, I end up watching Sam and Margot play for a little while before I start doing dishes, editing photos, or doing something else productive while they play. 

On one hand, it’s nice no longer having to devote 100% of my time and energy to keeping Margot entertained and distracted from pestering Sam every evening, but on the other hand, it actually makes me kind of sad.  The time I used to spend playing with Margot after work was a great bonding experience for us, and I always felt very close to her whenever she’d flop repeatedly into my lap with a toy and insist that I play with her.  We haven’t done that in about a week, though, and I really miss it, but I’m hoping our playtimes will resume at least a little bit once we’re back home.  Fortunately, Justin and I still get our Margot cuddle time whenever she winds down every evening just before bed, which is actually my favorite time with her because she’s SO sweet when she’s sleepy.  



Cuddling with Lexie by the fire (I miss this so much)



Another little thing I want to mention is the fact that the weather is starting to turn colder at night and in the early mornings, and in true Dobe fashion, little Margot has started shivering and trying to snuggle whenever she’s cold.  (Dobermans are known for being very cold-blooded, particularly because of their thin coats.)  I cannot tell you how much this makes me miss Lexie, as she was the Queen of Snuggles every winter.  In fact, every fall I would get really excited about the fact that it was almost time to snuggle with Lexie under the blankets and by the fire.  She would paw at the blanket and nudge it with her nose until you’d cover her up, and as soon as she got under that blanket she’d let out a looooong moan of contentment.   (Oh, Lou….I miss you so much.)



Anyway, last night Margot’s “aunties” (Kristy, Susie, and Mandee) all came over to drink wine and have a little girls’ night out on the porch.  Margot was extremely well behaved and spent the majority of the evening just sitting on the sofa with me.  As it got colder, I thought I felt her shiver a little bit, so I covered her with the blanket that was on my lap.  At first, she didn’t really understand what was happening and immediately uncovered herself, but when I covered her up a second time, I guess she suddenly realized how much warmer it was underneath the blanket, and she was perfectly content staying there.  I have a feeling Margot is going to enjoy laying by the fireplace this winter, too.  :)

Margot has been performing “lie down” more consistently, and as soon as she turns 16 weeks-old, we will be enrolling her in a group obedience class at the Animal Care Clinic, where she’ll learn even more commands, like “come,” “stay,” etc., which I am very excited about.  Not to brag or anything, but I have a feeling that Margot will be one of the star pupils in her class, as she already impresses everyone with her good behavior, like at the Chili Fest last weekend. 

Yes, I think it’s safe to say that Justin and I are pretty proud of our little girl.  :)

A Breakthrough Moment

Before I get into the good news I have regarding a possible breakthrough with Sam and Margot yesterday evening, I wanted to give a heads up about Kristy’s missing cat, Posey, just in case anyone who reads this blog also happens to live near me on the Southside of Huntington.  We’re all very worried about Posey because she is not an outdoor cat, and she is also an excellent hider, so she is probably very frightened and hiding out somewhere.  We have been putting the word out through Facebook and other social media sites, and Kristy posted this ad on Craigslist this morning, but so far we haven’t had any luck finding her.

Kristy and Posey

I really hate this for Kristy because her cats are her babies, which is something I understand completely.  Not only that, but Kristy is a HUGE animal lover and even recently spent several days taking care of a stray cat that just showed up on her doorstep one day.  She did everything she could to find the cat’s owner, and even offered to pay to have the cat spayed if the owner couldn’t be found and someone else wanted to adopt her (with three cats and a turtle already living in their apartment, Kristy simply wasn’t able to take her in).  Thankfully, she was successful in finding the cat’s owner and was thrilled the day she reunited Sage (the lost kitty) with her mommy.  So, believe me, if anyone deserves to have their lost cat found, it’s Kristy.  Again, if you live on the Southside and think you may have seen Posey, please reply to Kristy’s ad on Craigslist immediately.

Okay, so as I mentioned earlier, Margot and Sam may have had a little breakthrough last night.   After I got home from work, Margot was being her usual, playful self and pestering Sam, so I tried to distract her by starting up a game of ball.  Margot was so full of energy that she insisted I chase her around the house in order to retrieve the ball from her.  As we were playing, Sam started barking, but it wasn’t her usual “annoyed-with-Margot” type of bark.  I actually recognized it as the same type of bark that Sam used to give whenever Lexie and I would play a game of chase with one of Lexie’s stuffed animals.  Sometimes, Sam would get so excited watching me chase Lexie around that she’d start barking, and eventually she’d even jump in, grab the stuffed animal, and start playing tug with Lou.  

Needless to say, I was really surprised when I realized that Sam was barking out of excitement rather than annoyance, but I immediately encouraged her to join in.  Then, to my further amazement, Sam actually started playing with Margot!  I grabbed my phone, of course, because no one else was home, and I wanted to have proof of this incredible moment.

Sam and Margot’s playtime only lasted a few minutes before Justin got home from work, and they ended their game in order to greet him.  After that, Sam was no longer interested in playing with Margot, but just the fact that she played with her for a few minutes was enough to put me (and Margot, I’m sure) on Cloud 9!  Margot continued to pester Sam off and on for the rest of the evening, but each time she did I would wait a few minutes to gauge Sam’s reaction, and when I could tell that Sam had had enough, I’d distract Margot with a new game.   Overall, though, I would say that it was a much improved evening compared to the night before, especially considering the fact that Sam actually played with Margot, if only for a moment.  (I’m still in shock.)

Feeling Pretty Low

We made it back home to WV from our vacation in Emerald Isle, NC this past Friday evening.  I wish I could tell you that I had a fantastic time, but unfortunately I had to go to the beach with a VERY heavy heart this year.  Don’t get me wrong, the beach was beautiful, the house was amazing, my friends were awesome (all 15 of them), and my little brother even proposed to his girlfriend, Kristy!   Like I said, though, it was just very unfortunate that my heart wasn’t 100% into the vacation this year due to the sudden loss of my Jocie the day before we left and, of course, the tragic loss of my Lou just a month prior to that.  Still, I tried to put on a happy face and not think about the sadness for the majority of our vacation, but it all sunk in pretty hard during the drive home.

All of us in Emerald Isle, NC, 2012

I also wish I could tell you that my mood improved greatly once I was reunited with Margot and Sam, but again, unfortunately I cannot.  Although I was VERY happy to see Sam and Margot again, my heart still remains heavy, as I have had to make a very difficult decision this past weekend.   Margot has basically become obsessed with Sam and will NOT leave her alone.  It’s very sad because she is only being a normal puppy and wanting Sam to play with her, but it truly is making Sam’s life a living Hell.  Margot is constantly nipping at her, climbing all over her, and running circles around her, which is driving Sam crazy.  I did some reading about this type of situation online, and everything advises against yelling at Margot because it might really confuse her, as she is merely behaving like a normal, playful puppy.  The articles I’ve read said that the best thing to do is separate the older dog from the puppy while the puppy is being playful, but that has proven to be a problem for us because Sam doesn’t like spending time alone.  We’ve tried allowing Sam to go upstairs by herself in order to get away from Margot for a while, but if Justin and I BOTH are not upstairs with her, she doesn’t want to stay up there.  She’ll come back down to the baby gate and cry until we let her back down, despite knowing that the puppy is going to continue picking on her. 



Reunited and it feels so gooood!



Fortunately, Justin’s mother apparently fell in LOVE with our Sam while she babysat the girls for us last week.  She loves how affectionate Sam is, and she even let Sam sleep in the bed with her at night, which is Sam’s idea of HEAVEN.  Not only that, but Sam also loved spending her days lounging on Justin’s parents’ screened-in wrap-around porch and enjoyed their large, fenced-in back yard.  Therefore, I am considering a sort of “joint custody” arrangement between us and Justin’s parents because not only do I feel like it might make Sam much happier, but Justin’s mother has mentioned several times how much she misses Sam ever since we picked her up last Friday. 

Even as I type this, though, the thought of not having Sam at home with me 24/7 makes my heart ache, which is why I’m only considering doing this on a trial basis for now.  The thing is, I really don’t know how much time Sam has left, and I’d much rather her spend her golden years enjoying a big back yard, chillin’ out on a screened-in porch, and soaking up the tons of affection that I know Justin’s mother will give her than spend her final days constantly trying to avoid the annoyance of an incessantly nipping, rambunctious puppy.  Believe me, I would not be giving this “joint custody” idea one ounce of consideration if I didn’t feel like it would make Sam a million times happier, and everyone who has seen Margot pestering Sam over the last couple of days has agreed with me 100% that it is probably a good idea.  So, starting tonight, we’re going to try leaving Sam with Justin’s parents during the week, and then we’ll bring her home on the weekends.  If Sam seems even the least bit upset about being away from home, I will just have to figure out something else.  However, if Sam truly seems happier staying with Justin’s parents, no matter how I’ll miss her or how much my heart will ache, at least I will know she’s happy.  (Ugh.  I’m tearing up just thinking about this.)

I really do wish I could have written a happier post about how much fun we had at the beach and how great things are now that we’re back home, but as you’ve probably gathered by now, this has basically been the worse summer of my life.  For the record, I’m normally a very optimistic person, and finding silver linings has always come very naturally to me, but it’s becoming harder and harder to bounce back from life’s “little” set-backs, especially when so many horrible things have happened in such a short amount of time, and they’ve all been extremely tragic with very complicated circumstances.  Just so you fully understand where I’m coming from, let’s re-cap, shall we?

Three years ago, I had to deal with my husband’s tragic (and highly dramatic) suicide on TOP of also dealing with his alcoholism and mental illness, and I even later discovered he had been lying to me for years about just about everything, including our financial situation.  My photography business basically came to a screeching halt after that as I focused on putting my life back together, mainly for the sake of my three girls (Jocie, Sam, and Lexie), which decreased my now single income even more significantly.  Last summer, I was laid off from my job due to cut-backs and struggled for two whole months to find new employment and practically drained my savings account in the process.  This summer, I spent two months draining my savings account even further (almost down to nothing) while running my beloved Lexie back and forth to Columbus, Ohio in an unsuccessful attempt to save her eyes, only to find out after putting her through three traumatic eye surgeries that she had Stage IV mammary cancer, which the so-called “specialists” at MedVet had somehow missed during previous testing.  During all of this, on the 4^th of July, I learned that one of my best friends from high school, Beth, was found dead by her 16 year-old son after she laid down for a nap the previous afternoon and never woke up (they believe she had a seizure).  Then, a few days later, the day after Lexie’s stitches were finally removed from her pointlessly empty, infected eye sockets, Lexie was in so much pain from her mammary cancer that she collapsed and had to be put down.  Justin and I tried to bring some happiness back into our lives by bringing home Margot, which worked for a few weeks, but then, just one month after losing Lexie (a couple weeks ago), I had to put down my oldest, Jocie, the day before our summer vacation after learning that she had advanced kidney failure and was no longer eating.  And now, here I am, thousands of dollars in debt and about to send my sweet Sam off to live with another family because I foolishly thought an 11 year-old dog and a less than 4 month-old puppy would have no problems living together. 

If I REALLY wanted to pile on the doom and gloom, I guess I could also mention that over the past two years I’ve managed to fall madly in love with a wonderful man who also just happens to have Type I diabetes and was told when he was 8 years-old that he probably won’t live past the age of 40.  That, of course, probably isn’t true, and it was horrible of Justin’s doctors to tell him such a thing back then, but the fact remains that he WILL eventually develop serious complications due to his diabetes.  Hopefully, that won’t happen for many, many years, but every single day I live with the fear that I will someday lose him and ultimately die alone.   So, how’s that for an extremely gloomy ending to an incredibly depressing rant?

Okay, okay…I will now try to prove that I’m normally an optimistic person by ending this Debbie Downer blog post on some positive notes.  For one, as I mentioned earlier, Zach and Kristy are now officially engaged, and I am beyond excited for their wedding next year!  (The date hasn’t been set in stone yet, but they’re thinking about the end of September, 2013.)  I am also extremely honored that Kristy has asked me to be one of her bridesmaids.  I’ve photographed literally HUNDREDS of weddings over the past eight years, but I’ve never actually been in a wedding before!  I’m so happy for both of them, as they make each other very happy.

Left - Margot at 7 wks with Mandee; Right - Margot at 11 wks with Ashley

Another positive thing is that our friend and roommate, Ashley, returned home from her three-month-long trip to teach in Africa this summer and finally met Margot for the first time on Sunday night.  I’m pretty sure that she and Margot fell instantly in love, and Ashley seems excited about having a new puppy in the house.   Ashley is also a lot of fun to have around, so I’m looking forward to many laughter-filled nights hanging out with her at home. 

Finally, I wouldn’t dream of ending this blog post without saying at least a few positive things about Miss Margot.  For one, I couldn’t believe how much she grew during the one short week that we were gone!  She’s so long and lanky now, and her paws are absolutely HUGE.  I don’t know how she’s ever supposed to grow into those paws if they just keep getting bigger as the rest of her grows!  I was a little worried that she may have become a little less disciplined while we were away, but thankfully Margot is still a very good puppy.  Don’t get me wrong, she has her moments, but overall she really is surprisingly well-behaved for being only 11 weeks-old.  I also think that she may be officially entering the teething stage, as chewing on the Nylabone is her #1 favorite thing in the world right now.   She continues to show bite inhibition when she plays, though, and she is still happy to redirect her play-biting to a toy when one is given to her, so I’m very happy about all of that. 



Teething time!



I will also say that, despite all of the above-mentioned doom and gloom that is currently hanging over my head, it is impossible not to smile, laugh, or feel at least a small amount of happiness when I’m playing with Margot.  She is so much fun and such a joy to have around.  I wish with all my heart that she and Sam were getting along better, and I hate, hate, HATE that Sam may occasionally have to stay somewhere else for the sake of giving her a “happily ever after,” but I am still so thankful that Justin and I decided to bring Margot into our lives because, otherwise, I feel like we would just be holding our breath and counting down the days until we have to say good-bye to Samul, too.   Margot gives me a reason to look forward to what lies ahead instead of just dreading what might happen next.  She also continuously surprises me with her ability to lift my spirits, no matter how overwhelmed by sadness I am or how hopeless I may feel, even if it’s only for a few minutes at a time. 

Sad Anniversaries Today

Last night, I had a much-needed impromptu girls' night with a couple of my best girlfriends, so I don't really have a lot to report in regard to the big "bean bottle experiment."  I can tell you that when I did play with Margot yesterday evening, she seemed to respond better to, "No bite!", and I probably only shook the bean bottle twice.  I should be able to make a better judgement about Margot's progress and the bottle's effectiveness after tonight, though, because I don't have any plans for this evening, other than playing with her and hanging out with Justin.

Not to be a downer, but I'm currently feeling kind of sad and nostalgic because three years ago today, I lost my husband, Chris.  Today also happens to be the three-week anniversary of the day I had to say good-bye to my sweet Lou.  I'm trying to stay positive and remember only the good times, but that really only makes me miss them more.  I loved them both so much. 

Lexie, Chris, and me

I'll post a happier update tomorrow, guys.  Promise. 

Sam and Jocie vs. Margot

As I mentioned in my very first post, I knew that Sam and Jocie, my other two girls, would probably have a hard time adjusting to having young Margot running around the house.   After all, Sam and Jocie are both old (11 and 12 years, respectively), and neither of them have ever been very active dogs.  Sam is part coonhound, and pretty much her only activities include eating, sleeping, using the bathroom, and cuddling on the couch.  Jocie is part Border Collie, which is typically an active breed, but Jocie is, well, a bit on the heavier side, to put it tactfully.  She has also always preferred to spend most of her time alone in one of her preferred “hiding places,” rather than interact with Sam or Lexie. 

When we first brought Lexie home 8 years ago, Sam was approximately 2 years-old, but every bit as lazy as she is today.  Lexie kept trying to play with Sam, but it only made Sam nervous, and she would run to Chris, my late husband, for comfort and protection from the wild puppy.   (Oh yeah, I should mention that Sam is also a very nervous dog who is easily “traumatized” and has been known to eat large areas of fur off her back as a result.)  When Lexie attempted to cuddle Sam the first night we brought her home and Sam tried to run away, Chris actually made Sam lie still and let Lexie cuddle her, even though Sam really didn’t want to at first.   However, from that night on, Sam and Lexie became the BIGGEST cuddle buddies you’ve ever seen, and for the next 8 years, they were basically each other’s pillows and/or body-warmers. 

Therefore, I have been hoping that history will repeat itself, and hopefully Sam will learn to tolerate and eventually love Margot, just like she did with Lexie.   Until a couple days ago, though, I wasn’t so sure that was ever going to happen.  Sam was a nervous wreck for the first couple of days after we brought Margot home.  She eventually stopped being nervous after about the first week, but Sam still refused to let Margot have much contact with her and actually started hiding behind the sofa to get away from the crazy puppy.  

Jocie, on the other hand, hasn’t acted quite as upset about Margot joining our family, but Jocie has always been kind of an old bitty with very little tolerance for younger dogs, and Margot is apparently no exception.   If Margot tries to play with Jocie, Jocie gives off a low growl, just to let Margot know that she is not interested in playing with her.  On one or two occasions, Margot has continued to press her luck with Jocie, which resulted in Jocie actually barking and nudging Margot away, but she obviously has no intention of physically harming the puppy.  Still, I do try to discourage Jocie from growling and especially barking at Margot, but only if I feel like Jocie’s just being a grouch.  If, however, I see that Margot is truly overstepping her boundaries, I will let Jocie growl at her because I feel like Margot needs to “learn her place.”  As I mentioned in my previous post, Margot missed out on two whole weeks-worth of learning important lessons regarding discipline and dominance from her mother and siblings, so I feel like it’s actually a good thing that Jocie is establishing her personal boundaries with Margot.    I kind of wish Sam would be a little more assertive and do the same.

After watching Sam continuously run from, hide from, and generally avoid Margot for almost two weeks, I’ve started to feel really sorry for Sam, but also guilty for selfishly expecting Sam to be able to tolerate this rambunctious little puppy at her age.   So, I’ve made it my mission to make it up to her and also make sure that she and Jocie know they are still the Queens of our castle. 

Justin and I were already trying to be sure to give Sam and Jocie some undivided attention whenever possible, but we have recently decided to take that even a step further.  From now on, we will be taking Sam and Jocie on a puppy-free walk around the neighborhood each day after work, during which time Zach and Kristy, who live right next door, have agreed to puppy-sit for us!  It works out perfectly, because not only do Sam and Jocie get some much-needed exercise and enjoy a break from Margot, but Zach and Kristy get to spend some quality time with their “niece,” and spending time in a different environment with different people and animals (Kristy has three cats) will undoubtedly help Margot become a well-socialized puppy. 

Our first puppy-free walk was this past Monday, and it was even more successful than I had hoped!  Jocie and Sam were both grinning from ear to ear during their walk around the neighborhood.   They were both pretty exhausted when we got back, but they were also VERY happy girls, which made Justin and I very happy parents.   Margot was also having a blast at Aunt Kristy and Uncle Zach’s place when I went to pick her up, and Zach and Kristy seemed to enjoy having her.  So, I would definitely say that the daily puppy-free walks idea is a definite win-win for everyone.

I have saved the best news for last, though.  Later that night, as Sam and Jocie were both passing out after their big walk, Justin and I watched Margot climb up onto the futon where Sam had laid down to sleep.  We were prepared to yell at Margot if she tried to bite Sam’s ears or tail, which is what she usually does.  Instead, we watched in amazement as Sam actually allowed Margot to crawl on top of her and lie down on Sam’s back, and then both of them began to fall asleep!  I was beside myself with joy!  I immediately ran upstairs to grab my camera, hoping and praying that Sam wouldn’t change her mind and jump up before I had a chance to take a picture, but the two of them actually continued to cuddle for at least the next 30 minutes or so!  I don’t know if Sam was just so exhausted from her walk that she didn’t have the energy to protest or what, but seeing that magical moment was enough to convince me even more that daily puppy-free walks was the best idea EVER!

But wait!  There’s even more good news!  Despite the fact that Sam allowed Margot to cuddle her for a little bit on Monday night, she still hasn’t exactly grown to love Margot yet.  Sam continues to avoid the puppy for the most part, although she is definitely a little more tolerant about letting Margot romp around her for short periods of time.  Last night, a few friends came over to meet and play with Margot, and at one point I decided to let the girls out into the back yard.  After Margot chased Sam around the yard for a bit, Sam finally started barking at Margot, although not really in a “mean” way.  I just thought it was kind of funny that Margot wasn’t backing down, so I grabbed my iPhone and started filming it.  However, as you will hear in the video, there was a moment when I realized that Sam wasn’t just barking at Margot because she was annoyed by her, she was PLAYING with her!!!   I realized this after I noticed that Sam’s tail was wagging, and she even seemed to be smiling in between barks, but it wasn’t until Margot ran and Sam actually ran after her that I knew without a doubt that Sam was ACTUALLY playing with her!  As I said earlier, Sam has never really played much, not even as a puppy, which is why I couldn’t believe my eyes.   I am SO happy that I was able to capture this moment on video:

So, I would definitely say that some progress is being made in terms of Sam and Margot getting along, which makes me happier than I can even tell you.   I don’t really expect much more out of Jocie because she has always preferred to be a loner, but I do think her tolerance for Margot might improve as Margot grows out of her super-rambunctious stage.   Overall, we’ve still got a long road ahead of us, but at least now it feels more like an actual possibility that Sam and Margot might eventually become friends.   :)

6-8 Weeks: Crating, Housebreaking, and Play-Biting

Margot is 8 weeks-old today!  I can’t believe how quickly the last two weeks have flown by and how much she’s already grown!  I’ve never adopted a puppy as young as Margot before.  I estimate that each of my other girls were probably close to a year-old when I adopted them, give or take a few months.  I really didn’t think that raising a 6 week-old puppy would be that different from raising Jocie, Sam, or Lexie, but I’m learning that there is definitely a little bit of extra work involved.   Here’s what we’ve accomplished so far:

As far as crate-training and housebreaking go, Margot has done so well that I’ve declared she is a Puppy Genius to several of my friends and family.  For the first two nights, Justin and I slept on our futon mattress in the living room in front of Margot’s crate, and I woke up at 3:00 a.m. and 6:00 a.m. to take her outside (puppy bladders can only “hold it” for 2-3 hours).   Margot completely surprised us by how well she did and, I kid you not, by the third night our little 6 week-old puppy was completely crate-trained!   

I also consider Margot to be a Puppy Genius in the housebreaking department, although she is not yet fully housebroken.  She is able to hold it for several hours while she’s in her crate, she has learned that the purpose of going into the back yard is to use the bathroom, and she will use the bathroom almost every single time we take her out, which is quite often.  However, she will still occasionally have an accident in the house if we’re not watching her carefully because she hasn’t yet figured out that she needs to tell us when she has to use the bathroom, although I’ve been pleasantly surprised by how few accidents she’s had.

Last night, I had Margot over at my brother, Zach, and his girlfriend, Kristy’s, apartment, and I noticed she was starting to sniff around a little.  Then, to my surprise, Margot actually walked into the kitchen and towards their back door.  I immediately asked, “Margot, you gotta go pee?” and then praised her BIG TIME when she took another step towards the door.  Hopefully that was an indication that she’s beginning to understand that if she communicates her needs, we will respond appropriately.  

Our biggest challenge with Margot, so far, has been with play-biting.  For starters, I’ve learned that, even though Margot and her siblings were able to eat hard puppy food and were mostly weaned from their mother, many experts still consider 6 weeks of age to be too young for a puppy to be adopted.   Many articles say that it’s important for the puppy to stay with her litter and her mother for a full 8 weeks.  If the puppy is adopted before 8 weeks, she hasn’t experienced enough discipline in terms of play-biting or establishing dominance from her mother or her other siblings.  For example, as the mother weans her litter, she teaches the puppies that “no means no” and establishes herself as their leader by growling and/or walking away from them when they try to latch.  (We actually saw Margot’s mother doing this to her litter the day we adopted Margot.) Also, when a puppy wrestles and plays with a sibling, she learns that if her sibling yelps and stops playing with her, she’s bitten him/her too hard. 

However, because we brought Margot home before she had a chance to fully learn those lessons, she basically viewed me, Justin, and others as simply other members of her litter.  As a result, there has been a lot of play-biting and, while I know that this is typical playful puppy behavior, I’ve explained to Justin and all our friends that it is very important we discourage Margot from biting at all times.  It is also very important that we establish ourselves as her leader right from the start if we want her to become a well-behaved, obedient Doberman.

It turns out that this is much easier said than done, especially at such a young age, but I’ve been trying to combine a few techniques I’ve heard about online and from my friends.  First, I try to correct Margot’s behavior when she play-bites by telling her “No! No bite!” and then I redirect her attention to one of her toys.  If that doesn’t work and she bites me again, I immediately give a high-pitched yelp, but without pulling away (immediately pulling your hand away makes your puppy think you want to keep playing).  Then, I give her a VERY sad look right in her eyes and say, “OOOowwww!  Margot hurt me,” and then I slowly turn my back to her and pretend to cry.  It’s all very melodramatic and quite hilarious, but I think it’s actually starting to work.    She will usually just sit there and look confused for a second while I “cry”, but then she will eventually try to cuddle up next to me.   If she does this and remains calm for several seconds, I then gently pet her and say, “Good girl, Margot.  No bite.  Good girl.” 

Of course, a lot of times after I’ve “made up” with Margot, she will immediately try to play-bite me again, which can be frustrating to say the least.  However, I knew going into this that training a puppy requires TONS of patience, perseverance, and consistency, so I just simply repeat the whole routine if she bites me again.  If she does it a third time, however, I don’t just turn my back to her, I actually stand up and walk away for a little while in order to really get the message across that biting = no more playtime. 

As I said, we’ve been trying this method for two weeks now without seeing much improvement, but last night I thought I saw some signs that Margot is finally starting to “get it” because I didn’t have to repeat the corrections as many times before she stopped biting.  I’m not trying to kid myself, though.  Margot may be a Puppy Genius, but she is still only 8 weeks-old, and I’d be a fool to expect her to completely stop biting and chewing anytime soon.  After all, I’m pretty sure she’s not even teething yet.

Overall, though, I’m pretty proud of Justin and myself for our puppy-parenting thus far.   I think we’re doing a pretty good job of establishing our role as the “pack leaders,” as well as laying the ground rules for what is and is not considered to be acceptable behavior.   It can be difficult, though, because right now it feels like all we do is tell Margot “No!” when all we really want to do is just cuddle and love on her, but I know from my experience with raising Lexie that all of this discipline will pay off in spades in the long run.  In the meantime, despite our occasional frustration and exhaustion, Justin and I are definitely enjoying Margot’s crazy puppy antics, because we also know the day will soon come when we will actually say that we miss her rambunctious puppy phase.