16-Weeks Progress Report (FINALLY!)

16 weeks-old!

Margot turned 16 weeks-old yesterday, and we celebrated by playing at the dog park!!!  I’m shocked that I didn’t take more photos of her first dog park experience, but I was too busy loving every minute of watching her socialize with all the other dogs.  We met Courtney and Elsea there around 6:00 p.m. yesterday evening, and Margot immediately recognized Elsea.  There is a separate area for small dogs to run and play, which was empty at that time, so Courtney and I let Elsea and Margot have a little warm-up run around the empty area before I finally decided that Margot could probably handle meeting all of the other dogs.

Margot the wallflower

I don’t even know how to begin to describe what an awesome experience this was for me and Margot both.  Margot was a little overwhelmed at first when a herd of big dogs came over to greet her upon entering the park (we called this The Welcoming Committee, as this greeting procedure seemed to occur every time a new dog entered the park).  Margot mostly stuck to Elsea’s side at first and always made sure she knew where Elsea was whenever she got brave enough to explore on her own a little bit.  Meanwhile, Courtney and I were enjoying watching all of the dogs interact with each other and admiring all the different breeds.  One of my favorites was a GIANT, black Newfoundland, named Fat Head, who was so sweet and friendly, but still intimidated every dog he tried to play with because of his massive size.  There was also a sweet, stocky Bulldog, named Tank, a scruffy little Schnauzer/Border Collie mix, named Prudence, an adorable little mixed-breed puppy, named Miko, who was the same age as Margot, only half her size, a lot of Labs, lots of Chihuahuas, one Rottweiler, a Weimaraner, a couple of Boxers, a Husky puppy, and a bunch of awesome mutts! 

At one point, I was so caught up in admiring all the other dogs that I lost sight of Margot.  When I found her, she was sitting oh-so-properly in the corner of the fence, just watching all of the action around her.  I laughed at how intimidated and shy she was being and encouraged her to get back into the game.  She rejoined Elsea and ran around with her some more, but several minutes later, I found myself looking for Margot again.  This time, I found her sitting on one of the park benches, just chillin’ in between two dudes.  She definitely seemed more interested in making friends with the humans than with the other dogs for probably the first half-hour we were there.

"Get back in the same, Margot!"

During that time, Kristy and Zach came to check out the dog park and watch Margot play (Kristy was in HEAVEN, by the way), and Justin met us at the park after he got off work around 6:45 p.m.  Having more of “her people” there actually seemed to help boost Margot’s confidence a little, and she finally started socializing with the other dogs more, especially the little dogs.  In fact, by the end of the evening, Margot was having so much fun wrestling with a Chihuahua/Min Pin mix that Justin and I felt guilty making her leave!  But, alas, it was getting pretty chilly and I hadn’t brought a jacket, plus the sun was going down quickly, so we told all of Margot’s new friends “good-bye” and headed back home.

The one thing I learned right away about going to the dog park is that both the dog and the owner are going to come home covered in mud and dog slobber.  So, that meant that Margot had to have a bath when she got home.  The last time I had bathed her was probably a month ago, and she was a bit of a handful at that time because she kept trying to jump out of the tub.  Last night, however, I think she was too worn out to fight me because she just stood perfectly still the whole time I bathed her.  Afterwards, Justin wrapped her in a towel and she fell asleep in his arms while he held her on the couch. 

Making friends at the dog park

I honestly don’t think that Margot’s first experience at the dog park and with socializing with so many other dogs could have gone any better.  I’m so proud of her.  The weather is supposed to be nice again this evening, so I’m going to try taking Sam to the dog park with us tonight, as well!  I hope that Sam will enjoy it as much as Margot did, although I’m a little concerned that Sam might not handle meeting so many new dogs and people at one time as well as Margot did.  Sam’s 11 years-old, and for the majority of her life her world has basically consisted of me, Chris, Zach, Kristy, Ashley, Justin, Jocie, Lexie, and now Margot, and you guys remember how long it took her to warm up to Margot, right?  Typically, whenever another dog or unfamiliar person enters Sam’s little world, her initial reaction is along the lines of “Stranger!  Danger!”  She barks a lot at first, but she also calms down fairly quickly once she realizes that there is no actual danger.  So, I’m hoping that, even if she does freak out a little bit and bark at the other dog park-goers when we first get there, once she sees how calm I am and realizes how much fun Margot is having, maybe she’ll loosen up and actually enjoy the experience, too.  OMG, you guys just don’t even understand how happy it will make me if I get to watch my Samul run around and actually have fun playing with other dogs tonight!  I’m trying not to get my hopes up too high, but I do have a good feeling about this….

Anyway, I guess I should also give a quick 16-week progress report since I didn’t do one yesterday.   First of all, I’ve hung the bells from the kitchen door and have tried to encourage Margot to ring them before I take her outside to use the bathroom, but she is actually really afraid of those bells.  I thought maybe I just scared her when I first took her paw and made her touch them, so instead of making her ring the bells, I decided to just ring them myself before opening the door each time.  Well, I guess she just doesn’t like the sound, because that scares her, too.  Regardless, I haven’t removed the bells just yet.  You never know, she may get over it and eventually realize their purpose. 

Another thing that I’ve been doing lately, in regard to housebreaking, is leaving the sliding door open while we’re home so that Margot is able to go in and out by herself.  Margot and Sam both really seem to like this.  Last weekend, Margot actually took her Wubba toy outside to play with it on the deck while Sam laid outside on the deck with her and soaked up a little sun.  It’s just a shame that this is pretty much the only time of year that we’ll be able to leave the back door open for them like this.  It’s just not practical to leave the door open when it’s either really hot or really cold outside because it affects the temperature inside the house and lets in bugs during the summer months.  It makes me REALLY wish that we could have a doggy door because Margot hasn’t had one single accident while the back door has been left open for her.  In fact, whenever she goes outside to use the bathroom all by herself, she always comes RUNNING back inside and jumps all over us, smothering us with kisses, as if she’s really proud of herself!  Hahaha!  It’s pretty adorable. 

The only other major things to report are that Margot’s adult teeth are starting to come in, and she’s growing like a weed!  I kid you not, there are days when I SWEAR she has grown taller overnight.  Right now, she is almost up to my knees, which blows my mind.  What happened to that little 6 week-old peanut who used to be able to fit under my couch?!?!? 

Not only is Margot growing taller every day, but she’s also getting sweeter and sweeter.  This girl LOVES to be loved, and she gives as much love as she receives.  We still crack up at how Margot does her best to give everyone equal cuddling time whenever she’s hanging out with us in the evenings.  She’ll snuggle up to Justin and let him pet her for a few minutes, then she’ll get up and come over to plop down in my lap for a little while, and then she’ll get up and go over to the loveseat where Ashley is sitting to give her a few minutes of cuddle time, before eventually coming back over to Justin and starting the whole cuddle-cycle all over again.  It’s also funny watching her fight sleep for as long as she can.  Her eyes get really heavy, her blinks get longer and longer, and eventually her little head will start to wobble.  As soon as she nods off, though, she’ll quickly raise her head with her eyes wide open, and she’ll look around like, “What?  Who’s sleepy?  I’m not sleepy!”

I really cannot say this enough, but I honestly don’t know how I would get through the day sometimes without knowing that this little one is waiting for me when I get home.  After we got back from our vacation this past summer, I entered probably the worst depression I’ve ever experienced (and, if I’m being completely honest, I still haven’t really come out of it yet).  I’ve never been one to wallow in self-pity, but the amount of grief I’ve experienced due to so many losses in such a relatively short amount of time (first with losing Chris, then the devastating loss of Lexie after such a long, tortuous battle, and most recently the sudden loss of my Jocie just a month after losing Lou) has been, well, overwhelming, to say the least.  Unfortunately, each loss that I’ve experienced has also come with a huge price tag attached, which has resulted in a mountain of debt that I can’t even begin to wrap my brain around how I’m ever going to be able to pay off, which now has me seriously worried about losing my house.  There’s even more that I could add to this sob story, but my point isn’t to try to make people feel sorry for me (believe it or not).  My point is that Margot has been my little beacon through this fog since the day we brought her home two and a half months ago.  Sometimes, even I have a hard time believing how much joy she’s still able to make me feel, despite the fact that my life is pretty sad and crappy at the moment.  Margot doesn’t feel sorry for me, though.  She doesn’t know or care about what I’ve been through already or about how many more bad things are on my horizon.  All she cares about is playing and cuddling with me when I get home from work, which is actually quite a comforting thought.   I am so thankful that I have Margot in my life right now because she makes me forget about all of my sob-story problems and focus on something positive (her) every single day, even if it’s only for a few hours. 

To be clear, I’m not saying that Sam DOESN’T bring me joy because I do love Sam with ALL my heart.  However, after having just lost Lexie and Jocie so suddenly within a month of each other, I can’t help but face the reality that I’m eventually going to have to say good-bye to Sam, too, and it’s hard not to think about that every time I look at her now.  Once again, though, I have Margot to thank for not allowing me to focus on such negative thoughts.  Without Margot around, I’m certain that Sam would have spent the rest of her days just lying on the sofa, being lazy and lonely, and I would have done nothing but feel sorry for her and dread the day when I’ll have to let her go.  Instead, thanks to Margot’s persistence and Sam finally warming up to her, I get to watch my 11 year-old Samul play every single day, which brings me more joy than I can even begin to describe.   

Yes, I can say with 150% certainty that Margot is definitely the best unsure decision I have ever made.  I just hope that she understands how much she means to us and how much I appreciate her love, because I’ll truly never be able to say it enough…and Margot doesn’t understand English.  ;)

Bath time!

Weekend Highs and Lows

Well, we certainly had an interesting weekend.  It started on Friday, when Justin took Sam to his parents’ house to drop her off for the weekend.  I decided not to go with him because I thought it might be too difficult for me, but we received updates all weekend and she apparently really enjoyed herself.  We’ll probably be going up there tonight to pick her up and bring her home for the week.

9 wks Vs. 12 wks (The bigger she gets, the more afraid she is to be up on the counter.)

Saturday morning, we took Margot for her 12-week check-up and another round of vaccinations at the Animal Care Clinic.  The last time I was at the vet, it was when I took Jocie to find out what was wrong with her, and I was told she had advanced kidney failure and, unfortunately, I felt it was best to euthanize her.  After that visit, the receptionist told me not to worry about making a payment at that time.  She said she’d just bill me.  Therefore, I was fully expecting to pay around $200 when we checked out after Margot’s appointment on Saturday.   I also knew that Jocie’s ashes were ready to be picked up (a separate charge of $256), which Justin had generously offered to pay for me.  However, I was quite shocked when I was told that my total account balance was over $400, which did not include Jocie’s cremation and ashes!  That included x-rays, blood work, and who knows what other tests they did in order to diagnose Jocie’s kidney failure.  The only reason why I’m kind of put off about this total is simply because I wasn’t given any sort of heads up about it beforehand.  Usually, the vet will call and ask permission to do a bunch of tests like that while also giving me an estimate of how much it will cost.  I’m not saying I would have denied Jocie any of the tests she had done, I’m just saying that it sucked being blindsided with a total that was more than double what I was expecting to pay!

Thankfully, they are allowing me to make payments, but this really doesn’t help my already bleak financial situation at the moment.  To make matters worse, this weekend was my little brother’s 30^th birthday and all of our friends were planning to have dinner together, then go out to a bar afterwards.  After giving the Animal Care Clinic 2/3 of what was in my bank account that morning, I seriously questioned whether or not I would be able to go out and celebrate my brother’s birthday that night.  Justin happened to have a friend in from out of town, whom he said he could hang out with for free, and he, therefore, insisted I take the only $20 bill he had in his wallet so that I could join our friends for Zach’s birthday dinner and drinks.  The only reason I felt okay with this arrangement, though, was because Justin was already planning to make a big pot of chili to take over to Zach and Kristy’s the next day, which was Zach’s actual birthday, and spend the entire day watching football with everyone. 



So, I went out Saturday night without Justin, but by the end of the night I wasn’t so sure if it had been such a good idea, after all.  Maybe it was the pitcher of margaritas I had shared during dinner plus the few beers I had while at the bar, but I got a little teary towards the end of the night.  I just hated the fact that Justin wasn’t there due to our horrible financial situation, on top of all the other crap that has happened this past summer.  I just feel like I’m not really dealing with everything very well , and I keep trying to ignore the pain of it all by distracting myself and pretending to be happy and okay.  The downside to this strategy, of course, is the fact that my repressed pain and depression is finding the most inopportune times to rear it’s ugly head and create embarrassing social situations for myself (i.e. while sitting at my desk at work, while eating out at a restaurant, while hanging out with friends, etc.). 



Margot watching football with Justin.  (So cute!)



Anyway, Sunday was a little bit better.  Justin made his fabulous veggie chili, I made a batch of buffalo cheese dip, and we took Margot over to Zach and Kristy’s place for a day of watching football.  I’m not the world’s biggest football fan, mind you, but I enjoyed spending the day with friends and eating TONS of yummy food.  It was definitely a prime socializing experience for Margot, too, as she played her little heart out with all of our friends.  The boys, especially, loved rough-housing with her.  By the end of the night, she was completely WIPED OUT!  In fact, she was so zonked that she barely woke up when I scooped her up in my arms and carried her home. 

All in all, I think Justin and I did a decent job of making the most out of this past weekend.  I know that Margot had a fantastic time, and hopefully Sam enjoyed her puppy-free weekend relaxing over at Justin’s parents’ house.  I can’t wait to pick her up tonight and bring her home!  I missed my Samul cuddles. 

Sam just being Sam

Feeling Pretty Low

We made it back home to WV from our vacation in Emerald Isle, NC this past Friday evening.  I wish I could tell you that I had a fantastic time, but unfortunately I had to go to the beach with a VERY heavy heart this year.  Don’t get me wrong, the beach was beautiful, the house was amazing, my friends were awesome (all 15 of them), and my little brother even proposed to his girlfriend, Kristy!   Like I said, though, it was just very unfortunate that my heart wasn’t 100% into the vacation this year due to the sudden loss of my Jocie the day before we left and, of course, the tragic loss of my Lou just a month prior to that.  Still, I tried to put on a happy face and not think about the sadness for the majority of our vacation, but it all sunk in pretty hard during the drive home.

All of us in Emerald Isle, NC, 2012

I also wish I could tell you that my mood improved greatly once I was reunited with Margot and Sam, but again, unfortunately I cannot.  Although I was VERY happy to see Sam and Margot again, my heart still remains heavy, as I have had to make a very difficult decision this past weekend.   Margot has basically become obsessed with Sam and will NOT leave her alone.  It’s very sad because she is only being a normal puppy and wanting Sam to play with her, but it truly is making Sam’s life a living Hell.  Margot is constantly nipping at her, climbing all over her, and running circles around her, which is driving Sam crazy.  I did some reading about this type of situation online, and everything advises against yelling at Margot because it might really confuse her, as she is merely behaving like a normal, playful puppy.  The articles I’ve read said that the best thing to do is separate the older dog from the puppy while the puppy is being playful, but that has proven to be a problem for us because Sam doesn’t like spending time alone.  We’ve tried allowing Sam to go upstairs by herself in order to get away from Margot for a while, but if Justin and I BOTH are not upstairs with her, she doesn’t want to stay up there.  She’ll come back down to the baby gate and cry until we let her back down, despite knowing that the puppy is going to continue picking on her. 



Reunited and it feels so gooood!



Fortunately, Justin’s mother apparently fell in LOVE with our Sam while she babysat the girls for us last week.  She loves how affectionate Sam is, and she even let Sam sleep in the bed with her at night, which is Sam’s idea of HEAVEN.  Not only that, but Sam also loved spending her days lounging on Justin’s parents’ screened-in wrap-around porch and enjoyed their large, fenced-in back yard.  Therefore, I am considering a sort of “joint custody” arrangement between us and Justin’s parents because not only do I feel like it might make Sam much happier, but Justin’s mother has mentioned several times how much she misses Sam ever since we picked her up last Friday. 

Even as I type this, though, the thought of not having Sam at home with me 24/7 makes my heart ache, which is why I’m only considering doing this on a trial basis for now.  The thing is, I really don’t know how much time Sam has left, and I’d much rather her spend her golden years enjoying a big back yard, chillin’ out on a screened-in porch, and soaking up the tons of affection that I know Justin’s mother will give her than spend her final days constantly trying to avoid the annoyance of an incessantly nipping, rambunctious puppy.  Believe me, I would not be giving this “joint custody” idea one ounce of consideration if I didn’t feel like it would make Sam a million times happier, and everyone who has seen Margot pestering Sam over the last couple of days has agreed with me 100% that it is probably a good idea.  So, starting tonight, we’re going to try leaving Sam with Justin’s parents during the week, and then we’ll bring her home on the weekends.  If Sam seems even the least bit upset about being away from home, I will just have to figure out something else.  However, if Sam truly seems happier staying with Justin’s parents, no matter how I’ll miss her or how much my heart will ache, at least I will know she’s happy.  (Ugh.  I’m tearing up just thinking about this.)

I really do wish I could have written a happier post about how much fun we had at the beach and how great things are now that we’re back home, but as you’ve probably gathered by now, this has basically been the worse summer of my life.  For the record, I’m normally a very optimistic person, and finding silver linings has always come very naturally to me, but it’s becoming harder and harder to bounce back from life’s “little” set-backs, especially when so many horrible things have happened in such a short amount of time, and they’ve all been extremely tragic with very complicated circumstances.  Just so you fully understand where I’m coming from, let’s re-cap, shall we?

Three years ago, I had to deal with my husband’s tragic (and highly dramatic) suicide on TOP of also dealing with his alcoholism and mental illness, and I even later discovered he had been lying to me for years about just about everything, including our financial situation.  My photography business basically came to a screeching halt after that as I focused on putting my life back together, mainly for the sake of my three girls (Jocie, Sam, and Lexie), which decreased my now single income even more significantly.  Last summer, I was laid off from my job due to cut-backs and struggled for two whole months to find new employment and practically drained my savings account in the process.  This summer, I spent two months draining my savings account even further (almost down to nothing) while running my beloved Lexie back and forth to Columbus, Ohio in an unsuccessful attempt to save her eyes, only to find out after putting her through three traumatic eye surgeries that she had Stage IV mammary cancer, which the so-called “specialists” at MedVet had somehow missed during previous testing.  During all of this, on the 4^th of July, I learned that one of my best friends from high school, Beth, was found dead by her 16 year-old son after she laid down for a nap the previous afternoon and never woke up (they believe she had a seizure).  Then, a few days later, the day after Lexie’s stitches were finally removed from her pointlessly empty, infected eye sockets, Lexie was in so much pain from her mammary cancer that she collapsed and had to be put down.  Justin and I tried to bring some happiness back into our lives by bringing home Margot, which worked for a few weeks, but then, just one month after losing Lexie (a couple weeks ago), I had to put down my oldest, Jocie, the day before our summer vacation after learning that she had advanced kidney failure and was no longer eating.  And now, here I am, thousands of dollars in debt and about to send my sweet Sam off to live with another family because I foolishly thought an 11 year-old dog and a less than 4 month-old puppy would have no problems living together. 

If I REALLY wanted to pile on the doom and gloom, I guess I could also mention that over the past two years I’ve managed to fall madly in love with a wonderful man who also just happens to have Type I diabetes and was told when he was 8 years-old that he probably won’t live past the age of 40.  That, of course, probably isn’t true, and it was horrible of Justin’s doctors to tell him such a thing back then, but the fact remains that he WILL eventually develop serious complications due to his diabetes.  Hopefully, that won’t happen for many, many years, but every single day I live with the fear that I will someday lose him and ultimately die alone.   So, how’s that for an extremely gloomy ending to an incredibly depressing rant?

Okay, okay…I will now try to prove that I’m normally an optimistic person by ending this Debbie Downer blog post on some positive notes.  For one, as I mentioned earlier, Zach and Kristy are now officially engaged, and I am beyond excited for their wedding next year!  (The date hasn’t been set in stone yet, but they’re thinking about the end of September, 2013.)  I am also extremely honored that Kristy has asked me to be one of her bridesmaids.  I’ve photographed literally HUNDREDS of weddings over the past eight years, but I’ve never actually been in a wedding before!  I’m so happy for both of them, as they make each other very happy.

Left - Margot at 7 wks with Mandee; Right - Margot at 11 wks with Ashley

Another positive thing is that our friend and roommate, Ashley, returned home from her three-month-long trip to teach in Africa this summer and finally met Margot for the first time on Sunday night.  I’m pretty sure that she and Margot fell instantly in love, and Ashley seems excited about having a new puppy in the house.   Ashley is also a lot of fun to have around, so I’m looking forward to many laughter-filled nights hanging out with her at home. 

Finally, I wouldn’t dream of ending this blog post without saying at least a few positive things about Miss Margot.  For one, I couldn’t believe how much she grew during the one short week that we were gone!  She’s so long and lanky now, and her paws are absolutely HUGE.  I don’t know how she’s ever supposed to grow into those paws if they just keep getting bigger as the rest of her grows!  I was a little worried that she may have become a little less disciplined while we were away, but thankfully Margot is still a very good puppy.  Don’t get me wrong, she has her moments, but overall she really is surprisingly well-behaved for being only 11 weeks-old.  I also think that she may be officially entering the teething stage, as chewing on the Nylabone is her #1 favorite thing in the world right now.   She continues to show bite inhibition when she plays, though, and she is still happy to redirect her play-biting to a toy when one is given to her, so I’m very happy about all of that. 



Teething time!



I will also say that, despite all of the above-mentioned doom and gloom that is currently hanging over my head, it is impossible not to smile, laugh, or feel at least a small amount of happiness when I’m playing with Margot.  She is so much fun and such a joy to have around.  I wish with all my heart that she and Sam were getting along better, and I hate, hate, HATE that Sam may occasionally have to stay somewhere else for the sake of giving her a “happily ever after,” but I am still so thankful that Justin and I decided to bring Margot into our lives because, otherwise, I feel like we would just be holding our breath and counting down the days until we have to say good-bye to Samul, too.   Margot gives me a reason to look forward to what lies ahead instead of just dreading what might happen next.  She also continuously surprises me with her ability to lift my spirits, no matter how overwhelmed by sadness I am or how hopeless I may feel, even if it’s only for a few minutes at a time. 

Preparing for Jocie's Diagnosis and Vacation Tomorrow (Fantastic Timing)

Waiting for the vet to open this morning.

I just dropped Jocie and Margot off at the vet, and then dropped off my car at the garage for a state inspection and oil change before we leave for Emerald Isle tomorrow morning.  I wish I could say I was more excited for our vacation, but this Jocie situation is completely stressing me out. 

Sometimes I look at her and think, “This is it…” and other times I look at her and think, “She doesn’t seem that bad…”  Yesterday afternoon, after coming home for lunch and finding that Jocie hadn’t eaten any of the food I had left her and it looked as though she may have even vomited at some point, I gave Zach and Kristy the heads up that “Jocie doesn’t look good.”  Justin even asked me if I was “prepared for what the vet might tell me tomorrow.”  I still felt less than hopeful after I got home from work and couldn’t get Jocie to eat a peanut butter sandwich.  However, when Justin got home about an hour later, he managed to get her to eat the sandwich by breaking it up into little pieces, and her mood even seemed a little better.  This morning when I asked Jocie if she wanted to go for a ride, she actually got excited and practically ran and jumped into the back seat of the car! 

So, I don’t really know what to think about Jocie’s current condition.  All I know is that she’s not eating, she’s vomiting occasionally, she’s using the bathroom in the house occasionally, she’s more lethargic than usual, there’s a growth/sty on her left eyelid, green mucous has started forming in her eye, and her eye appeared to be swollen yesterday.  The good news is that she is still drinking plenty of water, she moves around just fine, and she still gets excited at the prospect of taking a walk or going for a ride.  Needless to say, I’m extremely anxious for Dr. Ellis to call me after she’s examined Jocie.  (I forgot to mention that the reason I dropped Margot off at the vet this morning, too, is because she needs to be weighed and given a de-worming treatment.) 

We will be taking the girls over to Justin’s parents tonight and dropping them off for the week since we plan to leave for the beach super early tomorrow morning.  I am going to miss them so much, especially little Miss Margot.  I know it’s silly, but I just don’t want her to be scared and wonder where her Mommy and Daddy went.  I also hate to think about how much she’ll have grown by the time we get back.  Again, I know these things seem a little silly considering we’re only going to be gone for a week, but as you have read in Margot’s weekly progress reports on this blog, a LOT seems to happen with her from week to week.  I just don’t want to miss anything.      :(

Anyway, I’ll post an update as soon as Dr. Ellis calls, which I’m hoping will be before noon.  Is it weird that I’m hoping Jocie has diabetes???  (I mean, as opposed to other, more life-threatening illnesses, of course.)

A Fun Evening with the "Aunties"

I have forgotten to mention in previous posts that, at Margot’s last check-up, Dr. Ellis informed us that she should not be playing with other dogs or going for walks until she is fully vaccinated, because the Parvo virus can live in the ground for up to a year.  Therefore, it’s just prudent not to expose young puppies to too many unfamiliar environments or other dogs until they’ve received all of their shots.  The sad thing is that Margot won’t be fully vaccinated until she’s 16 weeks-old, which is still six weeks away!  So, we haven’t been taking her for walks around the neighborhood like we had been, which I have suspected is part of the reason why she’s been so crazy this week.

Last night, I decided to take Margot over to my friend, Susie’s, house to play because I know for sure that Susie’s house and yard are Parvo-free (Margot has already been over to her house once before and never got sick).  I don’t know what it is about Susie’s back yard, but Margot just LOVES to romp and play back there!  She especially loves to jump in and out of the thick, grassy plants that line Susie’s gravel walkway.   I also knew that Margot and Susie’s cat, Pete, seemed to get along pretty well during our last visit, so I was hoping that Margot would actually have a little playmate for the evening.   In addition, I thought Sam and Jocie might appreciate having a few puppy-free hours at the house.

Margot and Susie played in the back yard for a while, then Mandee and Kristy came over, and we all ordered pizza.  As we ate our pizza outside on the deck, Margot continued to play and explore on her own for a while.  I loved watching her have so much fun.  She especially seemed interested in sitting in Mandee’s lap, which I thought was adorable.  She could probably smell Mandee’s St. Bernard, Atticus, on her dress, although Mandee does adore Margot and showers her with attention, so I’m not surprised at all that Margot likes her so much.

After a couple of hours outside, we decided to go inside to watch a movie.  I crossed my fingers that Margot and Pete would get along as well as they did last time, and to my pleasant surprise, they actually ended up playing the whole time we watched the movie.  Well…by “playing” I mean that they would take turns stalking and chasing each other from room to room, but that’s pretty much how one would expect a cat and a dog to play together.  At first, I was a little worried that Margot might have just been bothering Pete, but on a couple of occasions Margot took a break from Pete in order to join us girls on the couch, and within minutes Pete would come creeping around the side of the couch to see where Margot had gone.  So, it seemed like Pete was enjoying their little game of “Stalk and Chase,” but then again, I’ve never been an expert on cats. 

Her first battle scar.

Margot had only one little mishap while we were at Susie’s.  Mandee took Margot outside after she noticed that Margot had started sniffing around inside the house.  Once Margot was outside again, she got so excited that she tried to run down the stairs and into the back yard, but she clumsily tumbled down a couple steps and fell head-first into the bricks that line the gravel walkway.  Mandee said that Margot immediately got up, shook it off, and continued playing, but now Margot has a little spot on her nose where the brick actually scraped off a bit of fur.  I hate that her tumble left a mark, but at the same time I actually think it’s kind of cute.  After all, what kid doesn’t have at least one cut or scrape on their little body?  Besides, Margot thankfully wasn’t hurt, and I’m sure the fur will grow back eventually.

As for Jocie, I’m starting to believe that the majority of her problem is just Margot.  She tolerated her for the first couple of weeks, but I wonder if all of a sudden the realization just sunk in that “this puppy isn’t just here for a visit, she’s here to stay?”   The reason why I think a large part of Jocie’s problem has to do with Margot is because she almost refuses to be anywhere near the puppy right now.  She stayed upstairs all day and night yesterday.  She even peed in our bedroom because she refused to come downstairs.  Thankfully, Jocie is still eating and drinking, although she still isn’t eating anywhere near as much as she used to. 

This morning, after I let Margot and Sam out and Sam went back upstairs, I heard Jocie come down to the first landing in the stairway.  I encouraged her to come down, but she just stood there looking at me and Margot through the railing.  She must have really had to use the bathroom, though, because after a while she went down another couple of steps.  Once again, though, she just stood there staring while I coaxed her to come down.  Finally, I decided to pick up Margot off the floor, and as soon as I did, Jocie came all the way downstairs and went outside to use the bathroom.  It was like she was being hesitant about coming downstairs because she was dreading having Margot “attack” her as soon as she got to the bottom. 

So, while Jocie was outside, I shut the back door to the kitchen and took Margot upstairs to hang out in the bathroom with me while I got ready.   After I was ready for work and put Margot back in her crate, I went out into the bar to check on Jocie (our kitchen door leads into the bar, which has a sliding glass door that leads out onto the back deck).  Sure enough, I found Jocie lying behind the bar.  I decided to let her spend the day out there today, so I got her food and water bowls and put them behind the bar with her.  As I sat there petting her for a few minutes, I noticed that her left eye looks a bit swollen today.  So, after talking with Justin, I’ve decided to call the vet today and see if I can just drop Jocie off in the morning to be examined.  Again, I kind of doubt Jocie’s eye problem is related to her strange behavior and decreased appetite lately, but I’m anxious to hear Dr. Ellis’ opinion tomorrow.  I just hope that none of this is serious.

10-Week Progress (and Worrying) Report

10 weeks-old today!

Margot is 10 weeks-old today, and she made a BIG step towards being housebroken this morning!  I let her out as soon as I took her out of her crate, but as soon as she peed she wanted to go back inside.  I knew that she needed to do #2, as well, but I was late getting out of bed this morning and needed to grab some clothes out of the laundry room.  I figured I’d let her come back inside to get a drink of water or something while I gathered my clothes, then I’d take her back outside again before I got in the shower.  While I was rummaging through the laundry basket, however, I heard Margot run out the back door again.  She was pretty full of energy since she had just woken up, so I figured she was just going back outside to run around and play.  When I stuck my head out the door to check on her, though, I found her using the bathroom in the yard!  She actually chose to go outside instead of just finding a spot in the house!  HOORAY!!!!  (I’m actually surprised I didn’t wake the neighbors with my cheering.)  So, I guess I can add that little victory to Margot’s 10-week progress report, along with her improved bite inhibition, improved willingness to redirect play-biting, and being able to sometimes perform “lay down” on command, although we’re still working on this daily. 

Practicing "lay down."

Another big change we’ve seen in Margot is that she seems to be napping less and less these days.   As I mentioned in my previous post, Margot barely napped at all on Monday evening, and last night she didn’t really nap, either, although she was much better behaved than she was the night before (thank God!).  When Margot finally started to wind down around 10:00 p.m., Justin and I couldn’t stop giggling at how hard she was resisting falling asleep.  Just like a human toddler, Margot would get this really far-off, sleepy look in her eyes, and then she would start long-blinking, but as soon as her head would fall forward even the slightest bit, she’d jerk awake and look around to see if she had missed anything.  Then, she would immediately reach for a nearby toy and start lazily chewing on it, as if she didn’t want anyone to notice that she had just dozed off.  (“I was chewing on this toy the whole time, you guys.  I swear!”)   I tried to take a video of her doing this with my iPhone last night, but the picture ended up being too dark and you couldn’t really see her long-blinking or dozing off.   I hope I’ll be able to capture her doing this on video at some point, though, because it is beyond adorable. 

Sam tolerating naptime with Margot.

As far as Sam and Jocie go, Sam is more tolerant about allowing Margot to climb on her to take naps occasionally, but she still doesn’t appreciate it when Margot tries to play with her.  They’ve gotten into some pretty decent barking matches this past week, but it’s obvious that Margot is just barking out of playfulness while Sam is barking out of pure annoyance.  It truly is one of the saddest little relationships I’ve ever seen, because all Margot wants is for Sam to play with her, but all Sam wants is for Margot to leave her alone.   It makes me feel sorry for them both, but they’re just going to have to figure out a middle ground on their own because there’s nothing Justin or I can really do to help the situation, other than make sure they don’t get into any actual fights.

As for Jocie, I’m still worried about her, especially since she threw up a little bit during the day yesterday (twice) and she still isn’t eating much.  However, I will say that she did seem somewhat better last night.  Justin fed her a hotdog and she managed to keep it down all night, plus we saw her drinking water on several occasions.  Her eye also looked good.  I didn’t see any green mucous, and the whites of her eyes aren’t red or anything.  She also isn’t having any trouble getting up and down the stairs or moving around in general.  So, I’m not really sure what’s going on with her, but now I can’t decide if I should take her to the vet to get checked out before we leave for vacation this weekend, or if we should just keep an eye on her and play it by ear.  The sad fact of the matter is that I am BROKE right now and I’m really only going on this vacation because my share of the house has already been paid for and it’s non-refundable.  I’ve managed to save JUST enough money to pay for gas and food while I’m there, so can’t really afford to take Jocie to the vet right now unless it’s absolutely, without a doubt, 100% necessary.   Trust me, I would forego my vacation entirely if it meant saving Jocie’s life, without hesitation; however, for all the reasons I mentioned above, I don’t feel like her condition is that bad.  In fact, it may be improving, but it’s hard to say at this point.   

Ooooh, Jocie.

So, we’ll continue to keep an eye on her tonight and try to get her to eat more, and if she throws up again or seems worse in any way I’ll call the vet tomorrow to see what we can do.  If she does well today and tonight, is able to keep food down, and continues to drink plenty of water, I’ll probably hold off on calling the vet.  I’m just so thankful that Justin’s parents are going to be watching the girls for us next week because I know his mother will keep a close eye on Jocie and take her to the vet for us if it becomes necessary.   It just sucks because missing my girls was already going to be hard enough, but now I’m also going to be worrying about Jocie’s health the whole time.   So, please cross your fingers that Justin’s parents give us some very good progress reports so that Justin and I can actually relax and enjoy our vacation next week.  Lord knows, after all we’ve been through this summer, we deserve at least one week free from stress, drama, and sadness.

Margot's Insane and Jocie's Not Right

Last night, Margot was INSANE!!!  I don’t know what got into her, but she went non-stop at a million miles per minute from the time I got home from work until we finally put her to bed around 10:30 p.m.  Usually, she has what we call “crazy puppy time” where she’ll run at full throttle for about an hour or so, but then she eventually sputters out and takes about a half-hour nap.  Lately, she’s been going through the crazy puppy time/nap time cycle about twice every evening before finally going to bed.  Last night, however, she took only one little 10-minute disco nap before she was up and running around the house again.   She was an absolute terror!  She kept picking on Sam and trying to get her to play, but of course Sam wanted none of that.  She also kept getting into the laundry basket and shoe basket.  I swear, I probably used half a can of that spray that repels cats and dogs.  I had a lot of house cleaning and photo editing that I was hoping to get done last night, but I seriously couldn’t let Margot out of my sight ALL night long.  Like I said, I don’t know what got into her, but I REALLY hope she got it all out of her system last night.

In other news, I’m starting to worry about Jocie.  She’s my oldest dog, a Border Collie/Golden Retriever mix , who is around 12 years-old now.  I’m trying not to be a Nervous Nelly, which I kind of have been ever since we went through all those medical emergencies with Lexie a few months ago; however, my gut is telling me that something really isn’t right with Jocie lately.  Well…let me rephrase that.  Something hasn’t been “right” with Jocie for many years, as she is referred to as my goofball and has many hilarious little personality quirks, including an OCD eating ritual that you’d have to see to believe.  What I mean, though, is that she’s been keeping to herself a lot more than usual lately, and what worries me the most is that she’s not eating well.  It’s been almost three days since I’ve seen her eat a whole bowl of dog food.  We’ve gotten her to eat a few dog biscuits here and there, but not a whole meal.  So, last night Justin went out and bought Jocie some canned dog food in gravy, which she usually LOVES.  However, I was only able to get her to eat two bites of it, and that is NOT like Jocie. 

I’ve noticed that she’s got what appears to be some kind of a little growth or maybe a sty on her left upper eyelid.  It’s been there for a while, though, and never seemed to cause her any problems.  Within the last month, however, from time to time she’ll have a build up of green mucous in that eye.  After I clean it out, her eye looks fine.  It’s not red or anything, but the green mucous will build up again within a day or two.  I know I need to take her to see Dr. Ellis, but I’m terrified of what it will end up costing, as I’m now thousands of dollars in debt over Lexie’s surgeries.   The Nervous Nelly in me is also worried that the little “sty” might actually be a cancerous tumor or something.  I know that ignoring the problem won’t make it go away, but I honestly cannot afford any sort of medical treatment right now.  I can’t even afford this vacation we’re going on next week!  I actually tried to back out of the trip shortly before Lexie died because I knew I wasn’t going to have any extra money to spend while we’re there, but at that point it was too late to get a refund. 

Anyway, I’ve got a lot of antibiotics at my house that Lexie never had the chance to take, so I think I’m going to try giving Jocie some of those for a week or so.  Hopefully, that will take care of the problem.  If not, I guess I’ll just have to bite the bullet and take her to the vet after we get back from vacation.  I swear, these dogs are going to give me a heart attack and/or cause me to be homeless before I’m 40.

A Few of My Favorite Things (So Far)

No matter how rotten Margot is behaving (and trust me, last night she was PURE rotten), I can’t help but love the fact that she has recently decided that she prefers to play in my lap more than anywhere else.  She can be running all over the place, chasing a toy, terrorizing Sam, etc., but inevitably she will always come charging straight back to where I sit cross-legged on the floor and leap/flop right into my lap.  Sometimes she just sort of “tags” me, as if I’m her home base, and then she takes off running again, but most of the time she actually prefers to just stay in my lap to gnaw on her chew toys.   I really need to have Justin take a photo of her doing this in the near future because there will soon come a day when she’s too big to play in my lap like that.  :'-(

Another thing I love is the time that Margot and I spend in the bathroom together each morning while I get ready for work.  I started bringing her into the bathroom with me when she was around 7 weeks-old because I don’t want to leave her in her crate all morning, especially after she just slept in it all night and we have to put her back in her crate before we leave for work.  So, every morning I grab a couple of chew toys and a couple of biscuits, and I carry them and Margot to the upstairs bathroom with me so I can start getting ready for work.  She doesn’t like it when I disappear behind the shower curtain, and every now and then she actually takes a little peak to make sure I’m still there, but usually she just lies on the bathmat and kills time by gnawing on something.  Unfortunately, while I’m in the shower I can’t keep a close eye on her, and sometimes she finds something to chew on that she shouldn’t.   For example, the other day I accidentally forgot to put up the cord to my straightening iron, and I found her chewing on it when I got out of the shower.  Thankfully, my straightening iron is still functional because she didn’t do too much damage to the cord, but I haven’t made the mistake of leaving cords within her reach since then.  This morning, I came out of the shower to find her chewing on the pajama bottoms I had taken off just moments earlier.  Again, lesson learned:  stop being a lazy slob and put discarded clothes in the hamper! 

I’ve also started practicing commands with Margot while I’ve got her isolated in the bathroom away from Sam and Jocie, because it’s actually very difficult trying to train her with her big sisters around.  Sam is a treat hound and goes NUTS as soon as she hears me tell Margot to “sit.”  She knows that means that the puppy is about to receive a treat, and she’ll be damned if she’s going to miss out on that!  So, Sam always interrupts our training sessions by barking and trying to get in between me and Margot, and Jocie usually comes running whenever she hears all the commotion and starts demanding a treat, as well.  It’s total chaos and can be quite unproductive, so I usually try to spend some time training Margot alone out on the back deck  after Sam and Jocie have gone inside and now also while I’ve got Margot in the bathroom by herself in the morning. 

Here’s a little video I shot this morning.  You can see how Margot is so good at sitting that she will actually do it before I even have a chance to give her the command.  I also ask her to “lie down” in this video, although I only just started teaching her this command a few days ago and she doesn’t quite get it yet.  I wasn’t able to film this because I had a treat in one hand and my iPhone in the other, but I also use a hand gesture whenever I give her the command to “lie down” by lowering my hand, palm down, and touching the floor.  This morning, each time I lowered my hand to the floor and said, “Lie down, Margot,” she would actually raise her paw and kind of wave at me.  It made me wonder if, by using that hand gesture, she may actually think that I want her to make the same gesture with her paw.  Haha!  I’m really only half kidding.  I’m sure she’s probably waving because she just wants me to hurry up and give her a treat since she’s already sitting like a good girl, but then again, Margot is a Puppy Genius….

For the most part, though, Margot is pretty good while she’s in the bathroom with me.  Sometimes she gets a little whiny because she wants me to sit in the floor so she can play in my lap, but unfortunately I just don’t have time.  I’ve been trying to make up some hours at work since I had to take two sick days a couple weeks ago (stomach virus), which is why I haven’t had a lot of extra time in the morning lately, but after this week I may try to adjust my schedule so that I can actually sit and play with her for about 30 minutes before I leave for work.  In the meantime, Margot usually just ends up passing out on the bathmat a few minutes before I’ve finished getting ready, and then I carry her sleepy little body back downstairs and put her in her crate. 

Finally, I love how interested Margot seems to be in music, particularly orchestral music.  I discovered this the very first morning that I brought her into the bathroom with me.  I always turn on music before I shower, and when I did, Margot stopped dead in her tracks, turned to look at my iPhone dock, and then actually walked toward the sound.  I realized that she had never really heard music before, as we usually left the TV turned on to a random television station at night because we thought that hearing people talking in the other room would keep her from feeling lonely.   

Later that evening, as Justin and I were watching a movie and playing with Margot on the couch, she suddenly stopped and looked at the television during a scene that involved a rising orchestral crescendo.   At first, we thought that it was just the rising volume and intensity of the scene itself that caught her attention, but she reacted the same way a little later on during a scene that had a violin playing softly in the background.  We laughed at how interested she seemed to be in the music, and I told Justin that she had reacted very similarly that morning when I turned on my iPod.  So, ever since then, we have left the TV tuned to the classical music station each night when we go to bed.

I realize that this probably sounds ridiculous, especially since I already jokingly refer to Margot as a “puppy genius,” but I swear that she really does seem to prefer orchestral-type music to any other kind.  This morning was a perfect example.  I was listening to the “Cool New Music: Summer 2012” playlist on the Songza app, which consisted mostly of indie-type songs from artists like Fiona Apple, Passion Pit, Walk the Moon, etc.  Margot was just playing and doing her usual thing the whole time the music was playing, but then a really pretty instrumental song came on that featured a lot of violins and wood instruments (I wish I could remember the name of the song and/or artist), and, once again, Margot stopped what she was doing and turned to look at where the music was coming from.  I guess there’s just something about those types of sounds that grab her attention more than other instruments, such as drums and guitars.  No matter what that reason may be, we think it’s pretty darn cute.